you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
