Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
