She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
