And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
