I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
And then he peed in my hair
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