what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
