trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
