Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
