Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
