I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
