i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
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