she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
