Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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