Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
