I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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