is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
