My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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