Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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