turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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