My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
