So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
