just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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