i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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