Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize