I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
do herpes really smell.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
