I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
