i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he fucked my hip out of place.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
