you lied. pity sex is amazing.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
