You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
