So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
