How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I looked at my own cervix.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
