So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
