erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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