apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
