I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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