The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I had to cum in my sink.
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