Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
