my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
