who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Randomize
