Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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