you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
