My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
