could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
