Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Church boner. Awkwardddd
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
