Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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