So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
