Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
