so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
