Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize