I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
This baby is an asshole
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
