There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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